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Most users ever online was 328 on 2012-09-14, 11:57 am

Bloody ATOS

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Bloody ATOS

Post  cyprussyd on 2015-12-22, 2:39 pm

ATOS force obese 900 year old man to do worldwide parcel delivery job

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ATOS has ruled that an obese 900 year old man is ‘fit to work’, and fully capable of delivering millions of parcels on Christmas Eve.
ATOS spokesperson Neville Satan defended the ruling, saying the organisation scrupulously applied the standard ‘is the person dead?’ test to their Northern client.
“Mr Claus may be 900 years but he managed to the parcel delivery job last Christmas” said Mr Satan. “He’s done sod all since then so as far as we are concerned it’s back to work you fat, lazy bastard.”

Critics say ATOS are being cruel and inhumane, saying that Mr Claus has to deliver the millions of parcels using a primitive sleigh and without being able to use those little ‘while you were out’ cards to send people to the depot. Instead, Mr Claus has to deliver the parcels at all costs, even if it means squeezing down the chimney to do so.
Mr Satan rejected the criticism saying that most ATOS clients have far more onerous demands placed upon them.
“We make the disabled and the mentally ill jump through all sorts of hoops and work them till they are dead, so Mr Claus has it easy.”
“That is why we will make him deliver chocolate products at Easter and also do some tooth collection work as and when required” said Mr Satan.



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Re: Bloody ATOS

Post  silvers on 2015-12-22, 10:31 pm

Yes, they are renowned for being  cloo less.      Very Happy
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